Is Your Dream Renovation Ruining Your Relationship? Here’s What Experts Say

With well-thought out plans, highly-rated contractors and top-notch materials, a renovation can completely transform your home. While that’s typically an exciting thought for most homeowners, the process can also be quite nerve-wracking — think tons of contracts, decisions and sometimes, unexpected costs.

When an issue presents itself throughout the usually longer-than-expected renovation process, relationships between homeowners can suffer. According to Block Renovation’s latest report, 15% of boomers and 22% of Gen Xers reported tension with a partner or loved one compared to 39% of millennials, who said the process put a strain on their relationships.

The increased pressure to make decisions, both financially and stylistically, is bound to put any relationship to the test. Eric Bramlett, realtor and owner of Bramlett Real Estate, has plenty of experience assisting couples with their renovations.

“It goes without saying that any renovation project can be a stressful time for a lot of couples, and the different stress points do vary. However, the most common one I see comes down to budget. The key is to try and strike a balance so both partners are happy,” says Bramlett.

So how exactly can you do that? We’ve outlined the top stressors that can appear throughout a renovation, along with expert tips on handling disagreements and making decisions as a unit.

Renovations can be frustrating for a number of reasons, but there are a few common concerns that tend to pop up for almost all homeowners going through the process. Understanding them before signing that contract can prepare you and your partner for what’s to come.

• Financial decisions: One partner may desire high-end finishes while the other is more interested in saving.
• Renovation timeline: The timeline at the beginning of the process changes throughout, causing unexpected (and frustrating) delays.
• Other changes: For example, the materials the couple initially decided on are no longer available, or the cost for those materials has changed.

Lack of communication is usually at the root of most issues couples face during the renovation. Here are a few points to discuss with your partner before beginning the renovation and while it’s in progress.

Create a clear budget

If you and your partner can settle on a clear budget early on, you’ll be more likely to agree on whether or not new additions or changes are possible once the project is underway. Bramlett also suggests creating a list of key goals you hope to achieve throughout the renovation process so that your priorities are aligned.

Collaborate at every step

Maybe one person is more passionate about flooring decisions and the other is more concerned with stylistic choices. While it’s completely normal for each person to have different interests, it’s important for both people to collaborate throughout the entire project.

“Couples who collaborate and communicate every step of the way are less likely to experience disagreements, in my experience,” says Bramlett. “For example, it’s best to have both partners fully involved in every step of the renovation process, rather than one partner being responsible for one element and the other partner overseeing something else.”

Keep in contact with your contractor

Communication between you and your contractor is a two-way street, so don’t be afraid to ask for updates or express any worries you may have. Staying up to date with your contractor can help you face issues as soon as they arise.

Remember the end goal

Constant construction and decision making is bound to become overwhelming. Bramlett suggests looking at the bigger picture: “If the renovation process starts to get tense, take a step back with your partner and remember the end goal of the project. Remind yourselves that any renovation project is going to be stressful and that you’re not alone.”

It’s no surprise that renovations can put a strain your relationship. While it might be impossible to avoid conflicts altogether, there are plenty of choices, whether budget-, material- or design-related, that you can discuss in advance to avoid decision fatigue throughout the process.

Source: Home Ideas - goodhousekeeping.com